Dear younger me,
Well here we are at 26 years old! So far we’ve had many ups and downs but we’re finding our way! I think if you knew then what you know now you’d know just how special life is when the right people come along! You should know you’re a superstar in your own right! I know we’ve had it tough for the longest time but things are finally starting to look up! Remember how we used to read religiously? Well we’re finally getting back into reading again! In fact we even have 2 new favorite books written by
! It’s our new favorite series and we’re obsessed with it! We’re even working for her in a way now! We’ve commissioned a diamond painting for her! Okay so we’re about to once we have it! But she’s interested in something that we’re doing! How cool is that?! You’d be so proud of how we’re doing now and how we’re trying to work past the trauma we’ve endured for a while! We’re still wild and care free about things that we love! We’re still singing and dancing our way through life! We haven’t hit it big yet but we’re still trying! Let me tell you the one thing you don’t know about being older! It completely sucks! Being an adult is hard but you work through it! You’ve recieved a lot of life lessons and the biggest one we’ve learned, thanks to Dwina, is that it’s okay to be unique and stick out like a sore thumb! We still songwrite and some of our lyrics are still corny but we’re trying and that’s the important thing! So we’re not as good as the Bee Gees when it comes to songwriting but we keep at it just like they did! We have that same drive and we try so hard! And of course we’re still obsessed with our favorite color PURPLE! Purple has been our favorite since Prince died and it’s still our favorite even today! We’ve even started listening to the Bee Gees again! We even discovered Robin’s solo albums and we’re so obsessed with magnet and 50 St. Catherine’s Drive! We still have a few songs we can’t listen to but it’s okay! We’re even writing on Substack now thanks to Dwina giving us a push we didn’t know we needed! Dwina actually encouraged us to write what we feel! I wish you knew that all those times we contemplated suicide were just obstacles standing in the way of what we wanted! You wanna know what else is cool? We’re finally gonna work on getting a passport! We’re finally gonna travel to all the places we wanted to go! Including England to see our first red double decker bus! We might even get to see Robin while we’re there! At least that’s what we’re hoping for! We even finally got out of Nebraska and moved to Tennessee last year! We definitely have fun when we go out Friday nights and go to karaoke! We’re definitely working hard and playing hard! We diamond paint for hours on end without even taking a break! Sometimes we get up and dance to stretch our legs but then we get right back to it cause it’s our business now! We have a website too! We finally created a website to sell our diamond art! We still dabble in other things but diamond painting is our main career at the moment while we’re working on our music! Nobody ever understood us but that’s okay cause we understand us! Who would’ve thought that we’d have a diamond painting business or be obsessed with it or even have Dwina be our somewhat first client? Who knew our life could turn out this amazing? I think you’d be proud if you could see this! We came along way from mental, verbal, emotional, spiritual and sometimes physical abuse! We’ve finally started standing up to the people who abused us! We’re defending ourselves without fear now! Who knew that we’d be doing this with our life? After high school we didn’t know what we wanted to and we were stuck at 2 dead end jobs! Now we’re living life our way and loving it! We still have some fears like going home for the holidays afraid that dad’s gonna start something but we’re learning to ignore him and what spews out of his mouth! We finally learned where the verbal abuse comes from and how manipulated we’ve been! We’ve been manipulated since we could talk and that was mostly our grandmother doing all that! But we don’t talk to her anymore cause who needs that drama? We’re learning to cut out drama and other traumatic things to protect our mental health! We’re very big into the mental health thing now and especially self love! It’s been a really long time since we’ve loved ourself! But now we absolutely love ourself! We have fun when we want to, we have a business that we absolutely love, we have friends that we love and we’re making new friends all the time despite how introverted we can be sometimes! And you know what? Dwina’s taught you a lot in so many ways without even using a whole lot of words! We read all of her Substack stories all the time and a lot of the time she’s describing our life! You’d never know it but she really made a big impact on our life! And we’re grateful every single day that she took a chance on us and what we can do! We’ve really come a long way from where we used to be! Life is finally getting a little bit better! We got this! Let’s keep going! I love you younger me!-kenzi!
(I will now always spell my name this way thanks to Dwina lol! Thanks for the name change! Xx)
I never attempted Karaoke but glad you enjoy it. Thank you for enjoying reading my writing, Kenzi. I have never written a song but have always liked poetry. A friend did ask to turn some of my spiritual poetry into music.